Selby High School
| Selby High School | |
|---|---|
| Selby High School coat of arms | |
| Location | |
 | |
Selby , North Yorkshire England | |
| Information | |
| Type | Secondary School |
| Motto | In Arduis Fidelis "Faithful in adversity". |
| Established | 1908 |
| Headmaster | Paul Eckersley |
| Assistant Headteachers | Phil Stables, Gary Cannon, Stuart Lewis, Amanda Lumb |
| Faculty | 90 |
| Number of students | approx. 1,300 |
| Colors | Maroon and White |
| Website | http://www.selbyhigh.co.uk |
Selby High School is a school for the performing arts, in North Yorkshire. It was founded in 1908 as a Grammar School for girls (under the name "Selby High School for Girls"), housed in a grade II listed Georgian building. In 1968 it became a co-educational grammar school (renamed as "Selby Grammar School") and from 1979 a mixed comprehensive (when the name reverted to "Selby High School").
Enrollment
Selby High School's catchment area is around the Selby district, including Thorpe Willoughby, Hambleton, Monk Fryston, Hillam, Cawood, Wistow, and other surrounding villages.
Specialist Status
In 2003 Selby High began to raise money to couple with a grant to become a specialist status school. In 2005 the school finally reached the amount required and was awarded a specialist status in the Performing Arts.
Charity Work
Selby High School is well known within the area for its charity work. After raising thousands of pounds over the past few years the school is recognised by many charities and has received several honours for this.
Whiteboards
The school has recently implemented dozens of interactive Prometheus whiteboards in classrooms. These enable a new level of interaction between pupils and their work, and have been well received by all.
Future plans
Selby High plans to open a cinema for the use of the local community, and an all weather sports pitch within the next year. The renovation of several rooms with better equipment is also a key point in the school's development.
Hall Of Shame (The Worst Teachers)
Mr Reid
The most hated, and complained about, teacher in Selby High School history. Mr Reid should have been born a raincloud but was transformed by some hideous miscalculation of fate into a human organism. His bitter misanthropy encircles his being like a vortex, sucking the hope from every pupil in his presence.
Rather than teach his pupils (the conventional role of a teacher), Mr Reid prefers to spend his lessons insulting them and mocking their personal defects (even if they’re quite ordinary)- especially if the pupils are sensitive, and smaller than him. However, if they're female and he fancies them, he may instead waste the hours asking them questions such as "do you and your girlfriends ever have sleepovers?" while noticeably sweating and nervously fiddling with his pen. Unsurprisingly, there are many lurid rumours about him, and the playground has reinterpreted many traditional 'dirty old man' jokes to include him in the central role.
Even his fellow teachers can’t be bothered to hide their contempt for him.
Mrs Parker
A Maths teacher with the face of a moribund cow, and the personality of a cyborg.
She is famous for her utterly random, frequently bizarre, views on disciplinary procedure, i.e., once inexplicably giving an after-school detention to a pupil (me) for writing his homework in biro (rather than the preferred ink), then, in the same day, disregarding the actions of another pupil who broke someone’s nose for “insulting his Nicks trainers”.
Undoubtedly, a confused and clueless twunt.
Amusingly, she once grew her hair in a massive, vertical ‘block’ like Kid from 80s rap duo Kid ‘N’ Play.
http://www.gospelcity.com/images/static/interviews/kid-n-play.jpg Kid is on the left.
Mr McDonald
A Science teacher who believes he has some kind of mysterious affinity with actor David Jason – seemingly sharing his cosy humour and his gentle confidence, and believing he’s a ‘National Treasure’ too.
Actually, beneath this façade, he’s a miserly blackheart who is only in teaching because he enjoys the perceived power, the superficial authority, he gets to hold over his juvenile ‘minions’.
A despicable, little Johnny Hitler.
NOTE: the opinions in this section are not shared by Wikipedia or Selby High School, but are merely those of a former pupil (with a grudge).