User:Waffles815/sandbox

This is a humorous essay on Wikipedia. It reflects the personal opinions of some editors and is not a policy or guideline. However, it highlights behaviors that editors may recognize — and ideally avoid — in the spirit of building a better encyclopedia, one less bean-stuffed edit at a time.

In the deep of Wikipedia editing, some editors have adopted what we call the Three WikiMonkeys — behaviors that, while often unintentional, lead to chaos, confusion, and frustration. These are:

• See No Vandalism: Ignoring obvious sabotage of articles.
• Hear No Trolls: Refusing to acknowledge disruptive users.
• Speak No Gibberish: Communicating poorly or not at all, making it hard to track edits or undo

The Three WikiMonkeys

See No Vandalism

Ignoring blatant vandalism and pretending it doesn't exist. Editors exhibiting this behavior scroll past obvious sabotage like profanity-filled edits, replacement of entire paragraphs with nonsense, or artful ASCII spam — and do nothing about it. Whether out of excessive politeness, a desire to avoid conflict, or just hoping someone else will clean up the mess, the "See No Vandalism" editor watches Wikipedia slowly descend into chaos, describing the damage as “controversial content” or “artistic expression.”

Common signs include:

• Calling obvious vandalism “a different perspective.”
• Using “Assume Good Faith” as a shield while the page burns.
• Leaving pages covered in random caps-lock rants or llama drawings.

Suggested remedy: Revert obvious vandalism promptly. Report persistent vandals. Remember, Wikipedia is not a performance art gallery.

Hear No Trolls

Refusing to acknowledge or respond appropriately to trolls. These editors either engage trolls as if they are deeply misunderstood contributors or ignore blatant disruptive behavior, allowing trolling to escalate unchecked. Whether it’s because they believe in giving everyone a chance, fear conflict, or secretly enjoy the fireworks, the “Hear No Trolls” editor often ends up arguing pointlessly with users named “PoopWarrior69” or “Xx420BlazeItxX.”

Common signs include:

• Responding to insults with long-winded policy citations.
• Inviting trolls to Requests for Comment in hopes they’ll “come around.”
• Ignoring multiple sockpuppet bans while insisting “everyone deserves respect.”

Suggested remedy: Don’t feed the trolls!!!! Identify and block repeat offenders. Maintain civility, but protect the encyclopedia’s integrity.

Speak No Gibberish

Failing to communicate clearly and provide meaningful edit summaries or reliable sources. This monkey neither vandalizes nor trolls, but makes it difficult for other editors to understand what’s going on. They leave edit summaries like “yes” or “done lol” after massive content changes, cite dubious or nonexistent sources, or write talk page comments that resemble 3 AM group chat gibberish.

Common signs include:

• Edit summaries such as “fixed” or “idk.”
• References to websites like “www.myfacts.biz” or “conspiracytheories.fake.”
• Talk page comments like “lol no u” or “wat.”

Suggested remedy: Use clear, complete edit summaries. Provide citations to reliable sources. Communicate like a professional encyclopedia editor — not a sleep-deprived internet meme.

Lesson

While Wikipedia thrives on collaboration and good faith, we all need to avoid falling into the traps of the Three WikiMonkeys. Be vigilant: see vandalism, hear trolls, and speak clearly. Together, we can keep the encyclopedia banana-free and awesome.

And remember.

DON'T STUFF BEANS UP YOUR NOSE!

Seriously. It’s messy, painful, and has absolutely nothing to do with editing Wikipedia — but it’s good advice anyway.